On a Bad Temper
“I have a terrible temper, but I control it, it doesn’t control me.”
–Edmund Z Carbine, 1864-1926
I think I may have inherited the temper. Edmund Z Carbine could honestly say “I haven’t been angry in over 15 years.” I wish I could say something similar.
On Church Membership
…the Mormons as they are called are my people, their God is my God, where they live I live (If I can) where they die I die, and there will I be buried. You see that I cannot come back.
–Adelia Rider Carbine, 1846, Iowa
Despite being driving from her home in Nauvoo, she still knew where she stood when it came to the gospel. It was true. It is true. What else matters?
On Conversion
When I was 14 years old I began reading the New Testament. I could see that the Lutheran doctrine did not correspond with it, so I must find something in accord with the New Testament. The more I read, the more I was convinced. Then I had an opportunity to go to some Mormon meetings. I found the spirit of God was there and the love of the brethren was great. I then began to pray in secret, alone by myself, and investigated the Mormon gospel [for three years]….I believed that the Mormons had the true gospel. But I wanted to be absolutely sure that Joseph Smith was a prophet for all people ridiculed him and told lies about him, but I did not believe it….I was sleeping in our barn on the hay in the month of August. I had prayed out by the fence before I went to lay down, but when I laid down I was seized upon with some evil power so I knelt down by the bed to pray again but the evil power was tormenting me and held me in torment; Then I lifted my voice in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, then the power left me. I was on my knees. I felt a wonderful change. I was looking and listening and heard a still voice but low saying “Joseph is a true prophet of god. The gospel is true. Why are you waiting to be baptized and receive the gospel?”…I then went up outside the barn to give thanks to God for answering my prayer. I raised my hands up high and said “Halleluia! Praise be to God and the Lamb for answering my prayer” and said “Yes, Lord, I will be baptized into the Church soon as I can.”
–Hans Olaus Sorenson, 1849-1944
Answers will always come to our honest prayers, even if it takes a long time. Are we senstive to the Spirit’s whisperings?
On Forgiving
They robbed and stole from me my life time earning….Two long years rolled by and I never had a good night’s sleep thinking how I could get some way to recover that which had been stolen from me. Then a messenger appeared to me and called me by name, and told me not to do as I was thinking, as that was a cowardly act. And he said, “Look”, and he showed to me many great and marvelous things, and said to me, “All you have suffered and lost is not as much as a pencil dot on this paper compared to what there is in store for you. Now be contented and be happy, and do not as you were intending to do.” I awoke and found it to be a dream or vision, and jumped right out of bed and wrote it down, and I have not been troubled since, and I don’t want to harm a hair on any man’s head, but want to do all the good I can. I called that my Savior, as it kept me from doing that which I ought not to do.
–William Benona Graham, 1852-1926
Sometimes I want to hold a grudge. But that’s not the way of the Lord. I hope I can keep an eternal perspective.
On Revelation
[Anna Clementina Hawkins] kept company [with Lucien] for about two years. He asked [her] to be his wife. But he was not a member of the Church and didn’t want to become interested…. And [she] felt that she couldn’t marry one who was not a member of the church and was not interested, so she dismissed him, which wasn’t an easy thing to do, as she cared a great deal for him. [She] had always prayed that she would choose the right one for a husband. So now she decided to fast and pray about it….Her prayer was answered and she saw in a dream her future husband just as she later saw him as he sat talking with her father, the night he came to apply for the teaching job. She was looking through a glass door behind him. And as she went back through the kitchen, her mother said, “Is that your young man?” and [Anna] replied, “Yes, that’s him.”
–Anna Clementina Hawkins, 1865-1944
It’s sometimes hard to have faith that Heavenly Father will provide for us and guide us. But He always will. Even without dreams to guide us.