May Day, definition: May 1 celebrated as a springtime festival
I am feeling kind of down these days. Everyone is writing on their blogs about the beautiful flowers they are enjoying, about the lovely weather they are hoping for, about SPRING. My days are getting progressively colder and the leaves are mostly finished changing colors and dropping. I was having a hard time getting out the house before it got cold: now I can see I’m just going to spend the next few months indoors. It takes twice as long to get Paul ready to go out because I have to bundle him up. I think we’ll stay indoors.
This morning, I realized it was May Day. I have always had a special place in my heart for May Day. One year, when I was a depressed, lonely, loner teenager, a friend of mine left me a bouquet of roses on May Day. “Happy May Day!” the note said. She left them anonymously, but I knew who it was. I haven’t talked to her for years, but I’ll always remember the service she did for me back on that spring day when I felt so awkward and alone. It was a reminder that in the “In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer” (Camus); I just needed to stop thinking about myself and serve, as she did.
It’s just so sad that this year’s May Day is rainy, overcast, cold, and only getting colder. I must remember that summer will eventually come again.
I miss spring! (I guess it serves me right for bragging about good produce in November!)
Mayday, definition: an international radio-telephone signal word used as a distress call
I’m trying to find my ancestors. I researched James and Margaret and found their supposed marriage date in an index of marriages. The UK likes to horde the originals and won’t let anyone (even LDS volunteers) digitize or scan them for microfilm. So, for £13 I ordered the marriage certificate. (Yes, Mom, I know you claim Grandma already had one, but when I visited, we searched her apartment and couldn’t find it.)
For some reason, I thought that the marriage certificate would tell me everything. I guess I imagined a large packet or box delivered to my door with birth information and parental details, complete with an explanation of the mystery of where, when, and why Margaret disappeared fifteen years later.
Here’s what I got: a barely legible official copy of the certificate on file in a slim, small, half-sheet-of-paper-sized envelope.
The certificate tells me their names and professions, their ages, etc. Most of the information we already knew.
But here are my questions:
- If I didn’t know which James Simon/Simons/Simmons was my ancestor, how could I be sure this was their marriage certificate?
- How can I figure out where they were born? Tradition holds James Simmons as Irish, but we don’t know where he came from or when he came to England.
- How do I find where, when, and to whom James Delany/Simons was born? Because he was aged four at the 1871 census, he couldn’t possibly have been born to James and Margaret unless he was born out of wedlock.
- Could James Delany/Simmons have been born out of wedlock in the 1860s? Wouldn’t that have been pretty scandalous for this Catholic family? Can I assume he was born to people who were married?
I am completely lost as to where to begin. I’ll head to the Family History Library next Wednesday when it’s open, but my experience is the librarians there are as clueless as I am.
PLEASE HELP if you have any experience with family history!
Note: Any Benac family members who’d like to save £13 can view and download a high-res jpg of this image here for your own family history files.
Rebecca,
Thanks for commenting on my blog. It sounds like you are having a real adventure. I looked at your bookshelf. I’ve tried to read A Circle of Quiet a few times. I’ve lost interest. Do I just need to keep reading?
@judith.peterson:
I do like it. It’s not a quick read–I think I’m doing about 50 pages a week, a few pages at a time, setting it down and reading something else, and then picking it up again. I’m a wannabe writer, so it’s a good book to help me to think about why I want to write, what it means to me, what a “writer” is. There’s more writing-ish things at the beginning and I see what you mean about losing interested by the middle. But I’m marking lots of passages to revisit, so I’ll keep reading. I’m not sure I’ll go back and read the entire thing again, though.
I absolutely find that service is the way out of an emotional funk. Even if it’s just service for hubby (a batch of warm cookies waiting unexpectedly when he gets home from work) or the kids (sitting on the floor and reading book after book even if it means Mac & Cheese for dinner). I love to do service for friends and neighbors too, but since getting out of the house is sometimes hard that takes a little more work.Â
On a totally random note: have you ever read “The Five Love Languages”? I highly recommend it. I’m not a “self help” book reader normally but this was a very insightful book that totally changed my marriage – for the better.
@Nancy: Haven’t read it…I’ll look for it and add it to my list!
Well, there is far more than tradition that says James Simon was Irish. I have pictures of MY Grampa Simon holding me when I was a child, and he was as Irish as they come. My mother imitates his accent when she talks about him. He had a heavy accent and said he came from County Cork. My mother knew Logan and Aunt Neecy etc. Talk to her about what she knows. She gets mixed up on dates and details, but she can tell stories about the people she knew and the stories they told. We don’t know what happened to Margaret, but we do know that her husband searched for her and mourned for her.Â
You have to work backward to confirm that you have the right people. A birth record will tell parents names and ages–maybe also where the parents were born, so then you look for their  marrigae record, and it often tells an age, place of birth, and father’s name, and that helps you look for the parent’s birth record and so on. The birth record may tell the father’s age, etc. Sometimes you can add military records, immigartion records, census records that put families together, etc. They are all tiny pieces of a puzzle, and every once in a while, it all comes together.Â
Sometimes you have a red herring. My 2nd great-grandfather’s son Daniel lived with his grandparents after his mother died, and if I used only a census I’d have sealed him to his grampa, but I also found court records where my ancestor sued his inlaws to get his late wife’s property for the boy, and it says in the records that he is his son.Â
Sometimes two people have the same name. I have found two Elizabeth Dedmans living in Pike county at the same time. They were first cousins, and I’m not sure which marriage record applies to each. In that case, neither one is my ancestor. I just did the individual and marriage ordinances for both, and I’m sure the right Elizabeth will claim the right man.Â
If it were all simple and without complication, I’d have finished the family long ago when I had time and spent weeks at a time doing geneology.   With the new technology, more information is available now that 30 years ago, so you may find something new. Also, as people die, I have found that they take our needs up above and open up new channels of information. I found all sorts of stuff when my Gramma died.Â
Good luck. thank you for caring about this. Some peple get bit by the bug. Love, Mom
On the May Day issue, you had two winters in a row when you went to Australia in the early summer. If you came back now, you’ll get two well-deserved summers in a row. Meanwhile, go buy some flowers for your table. They do wonders for the mood. Buy another bouquet for a friend who might also like a lift. That will help both of your moods. Much love.
@Mom:
I would say that a picture and Grandma’s memories are tradition. Telling stories would be tradition. I’d say a family bible with the birthplace written in it would be more of a fact. I’d say official documents would not be tradition. But family stories I’d call tradition.
Do you think the census record showing James Delaney as a nephew is a red herring? Do you think his age is a red herring? Everything suggests he was born 1866 or 1867, but James and Margaret Simons were married 1869. Or is their marriage certificate a red herring? How do I work backwards? You say tradition says he’s from County Cork. Do I just start looking for James Simons born 1847 in County Cork, Ireland? When I find 15 James Simons there, how do I eliminate the ones that aren’t my ancestor? Or do I order the birth certificate for 15 pounds each for each of them? (The indexes don’t say anything about parents’ names.)
I’ve talked with Grandma but I feel like I just get stories. I guess I don’t see how that will help me find the facts. Like I said, these stories that I’ve read and heard really don’t seem to bring me any closer to finding military records, immigration records, or birth records for any of these people.
I would think my next step is to find the birth info for Margaret Ann around 1870, Edwin 1875, and James Delaney or James Simons for 1866 or 1867. I’m sure there are many of them born in Chorlton-upon-Medlock area. And what if James Delany really is a nephew? Where do I begin to find his parents?
Family stories are interesting: but how do they help me find the facts?