The other day, Paul, who is obsessed with the ABCs and sings the “ABC Song” a dozen times a day, said he’d say the prayer for lunch.
“This is the new prayer, Mommy.” And then, in the melody of the ABCs, he continued, “ABCDEFG, Thank you, God, for everything.”
“That’s not reverent, dear.” I responded. “We don’t joke about prayers. That sounds like the ABC song to me.”
“But that’s my prayer,” he insisted, frowning when I asked him again to say a proper prayer.
Today, when I dropped him off at preschool, I was telling his teacher about the ABC Book he made, and how he just loves the ABCs.
“Oh, we have a new snack prayer they just love,” she said. Then she sang the song I’d heard from Paul, except at the end it said, “Thank you, God, for feeding me.”
“Oh, I get it now!” I responded, “Paul had told me that but I hadn’t believed it was a prayer.”
“Oh, well, it has the ‘Thank you, God’ so it is the snack prayer,” she responded.
And since then, I’ve been pondering prayer. Does really saying “Thank you, God” make something a prayer? To me, a casual “Thank God” sounds like taking his name in vain. People say that all the time, and how often are they sincerely thanking him?
That said, everyone prays differently, and I certainly don’t believe God ignores sincere prayers. The Lutheran service that my son sang at during the fall was a “contemporary” service, with a rock band. Yet, I still felt the spirit as I listened to the pastor talking about how we can all be more loving to each other. Just because something is done with a different degree of reverence does not mean there is no spirit or sincerity.
But to my sensibilities, it is irreverent. In my home, I don’t want my son praying by singing an ABC Song prayer that sounds like it’s using God’s name in vain. I want him to bow his head, close his eyes, and pour out his own words of thanks to his Heavenly Father, speaking to him as the son of God that he is. I don’t want my son sitting at the piano, making up a melody for a song with the only lyrics being “God, God, God.” (He wanted to sing that for Family Home Evening this week.) To me, that is irreverent. I’d rather he sing of his relationship with his Heavenly Father through primary songs.
I just signed him up for his second year of preschool at the Lutheran preschool he’s been going to. Now I’m wondering if he’s just going to be confused. He’s already learned the distinction that, “At home I pray to Heavenly Father, but at preschool I pray to Jesus.”
Is learning reverence for our Heavenly Father, especially during prayer, something I should worry about? I do want him to learn the gospel of Jesus Christ correctly, and maybe the Lutheran influence will only confuse him.
Wow, that is quite the conundrum. I think reverence during prayer is important and I think it’s very much linked with sincerity. I think becoming lax in our reverence or sincerity in prayer is one of those little things that can make all the difference. As far as continuing with the current pre-school…that’s not a decision I envy you having to make 🙂 My first thought it just to make sure that you teach him how you want it to be done and be consistant at home. Good luck!
When I was growning up, we always recited the same prayer for every meal: ” Thank you for the world so sweet; thank you for the food we eat, thank you for the birds that sing; thank you God for everything.” We also had a bedtime prayer that we recited each night. “Now I lay me down to sleep” etc. I don’t know if they were more or less meaningful, but they taught me that I had to pray at bedtime and at meals. They certainly were’t harmful since we had nothing better at the time.
Paul does have something better, and I think you can teach him how to pray properly when he prays at home. You might also use this little opportunity to tell him that some people don’t know very much about Heavenly Father and Jesus. I have, on occasion, even had to clarify in Relief Society lessons that Jesus and Heavenly Father are different beings and that we don’t pray or teach our children to pray to Jesus or to the “Lord,” who usually is Jesus. Perhaps this is an opportunity to create awareness of differences and teach him that we are different–in a rather non-threatening way.
We don’t usually pray over our snacks, but the little song does remind the children to remember to give thanks in all things. Remember the Girl Scout prayer songs? Johnny Appleseed and the like. Not exactly Mormon standard prayers, but nice to remember to give thanks in the beautiful outdoors. I think that if you just keep teaching him and keep the dialogue open you have a good model to use when he is older. Mom